Season 12 December 7th: SHAMAN SHAMING SEASON

Official announcement was made on the 16th of November. Indeed, season 12 is coming to die2nite. Initial respondents were ecstatic, words such as "suprised that this game is still alive" and "hope we are getting the meta cap back!". We concur.

season 11? more Dallas to come

Being no experts, we invited esteemed members of the community to give us that essence de saison 11. Here are some happy customers:

Looks like the community will be distraught to see The Mysterious Season go.

In with the new, out with the old. We're over it. 

Exclusively from MLI here are some exciting updates we have from external spies on what may (or may not be) in the update. *Spoiler Alert*

• Bigger better mayers
• Bring out your inner dictator with improved mayor mind control for you to play out your wildest power fantasies with your lesser citizens
• Drunk brawls
• Take your showdowns to the next level. Forget punchouts. Invest in shoutouts. 
• Alcoholics anonymous meetings may now be compulsory 
• Shaman naming and shaming
• No more random plebians to take up the glory hole mask
• Only the most shameful of citizens to be chosen! 
• Meat Locker prevails despite the Gallow efforts 
• We are not entirely sure what Mama Murphy meant when she said "from now on gallows will have priority over meatlocker" but we assume that the meatlocker prevails
• Take that Gallows Incident
• Stank ranking
• Get ready to squeeze out your stankest rank all over the boards, now even more citizens will have the opportunity to rank, unless of course you shit your kegs too early
• Butcher is better 
• New burger hats

Lesser improvements have been mentioned: 

• Shamans may suck less, but probably will suck just the same
• Dream for mayor
• Ruintz for mayor 

Thanks to Ruintz for the intel, did we break patient-confidentiality? Ruintz rulez.

The Gallows Incident: Good News!

Some Swinging Hipster Meta Coverage 
"You'll come home from the holidays...in a body-bag. "

Straight from the world beyond! Fresh and shocking news reporting sightings of a huge probably-more-than-20 foot meta rising from the waves of Season 3!

Not to be confused with THIS family!! Censored for protection of innocents. 

Can't find that damned blueprint? Low on resources? Too freaked out to build the real deal? Don't fret! That's where the gallows comes into play! Go for the Meat Locker Alternative! Faster disposal, cheaper cost and recycled ropes! Go green!

Recently here at MLI we saw a rather daunting looking person in some executioner outfit donning some nooses in his casual manbag. He then proceeded to spew to our reporters of the Gallows Incidents that had been increasingly occurring in the world beyond. Reason? Oh... "meh-tas" just wanna have fun-un!

(Okay and justice, justice too.. )

If your jaw has not yet touched the ground we assure you that the death count of this meta's hands is a hefty 18 and counting! They unofficially go by the name of The Family. Yes, like a mummy, daddy, baby and heck chuck in the 2 year old labrador with 24/7 hyperactiveness. Except instead of fish rods and panty hose you'll find cupboards of stained nooses and a black book of prospective victims in their garage.

You know what to do when you see them in a town? Try to get in as fast as possible! You may be about to witness something magical! The meta has recently asked for some form of outfitting to be done by our fashion department and we have yet to work out something substantial and blood stained enough but we suggest they start wearing some swanky executioner outfits. These guys sure put Judge Judy to shame; their blows of retribution will hit harder than the town black-jack dealer who is slightly high off twinoids.

Good show chaps, you have sure set an example for years to come, may we recommend this snazzy phrase: for the greater good...

Warning: The Gallows will NOT earn you any sort of defence (this just in: unless you have a cemetery. Thumbs up dobergos and your super sekrit minion Anonymous!), only twice the satisfaction. But who builds the meatlocker for defence anyway? Phhffttt.

Enlarge for fun read

Lesson of the Day? [LOTD]
TMLI: being a good example since 19--
TGI: being an even better example since 19--

Note: Next time you witness a hanging you might wish to do your cheering/screaming to this groovin' beat inspired by the Gallows Incident.
100% credit and kudos to J-J-Joe Baldelliii (Alter ego, Felonious)

Feel free to post your [faked:optional] shocked reactions and admiration for the meta below:

Inside the Meatlocker: Meatshield Spec Ops

Watch ingenuity in real-time; our innermost secret strategies revealed!!!

Wonderfuldildostatuecastleville Update Two

It's now that time of year where the bank is filled to the brim with anti-depressant demand letters. Well just happens that sort of stuff really doesn't exist in Die2nite. So really the game is just saying "deal with it". Result? We have people dropping dead faster than rocket launched turds. And yes, no one cares about the mascot Toast!

Hope had almost been abandoned here at the Mud Wrestling Motel of Slaves. You couldn't walk a meter before a crazy rambling drunk citizen grabbed you by the collar and started yelling "Where the hell is our blueprint?!". Soon the morale raising thread "What the hell do we do now..." appropriately found its way onto our rather shambled forums. 

Special mention however has to go to our boy Baker of Cl*rks, never to be seen not rambling about meat lockering the fabled "mum47" or hanging "mum47" or at least doing something to "mum47". In fact, in a flash our alcohol and drugs had disappeared and the gallows miraculously built! Yes, this man really takes matters into his own hands! 

So after taking down notes, suspecting each other of treason, drawing up map outlines, cross referencing  information, running around frothing at the mouth mumbling "blooooprint" and being rather jealous of P-Tits locked love shack, complete with charged dildo and doormat for wiping your privates: 

Imirk casually walks in, hits that shit on the table and announces "Bitchez, it's all good, I got yo junk"

And still we need to hear reports of where this superhero actually found the damn thing?! Although yes, most likely he materialized it from pure sand with his god-like fists of fury.

Celebrations lasted around 10 minutes. Surprisingly no one got drunk, no one announced a naked fun-run and we were back to frothing at the mouth, now mumbling "human flesh"... 

Yes, in conclusion we still look like this sucker right here 

___________________________________________________________

"I'm down like shit on shoes baby!"

News on the street is there is another trippy scout rampage being planned by our now dead and limbo-ing Meat Locker loggers. Could this be the glorious future?! All we know is... George is sure down. 

Wonderfuldildostatuecastleville Update One

We here at the log bay, meat locker incident have sent our scouts deep - they went protected and have returned an updated report on Wonderfuldildostatuecastleville!

Most importantly, using their pre-war cameras they took this holiday snap of the two prime offenders in the latest weekend a Bernies stunt.

Since it just got serious now, we'll start with the update:

While almost successful, some citizens decided it wasn't the best idea to die and join in on the fun. 6 hours into town, we have uncovered all but 12 teeny tiny little squares on our teeny tiny little non-distant region. Plissken is right on top of Luby (seems nothing changes) and our 20th scout - the famous (WHO?!) brother of Miss Tits - Rckent!

Our newest recurit Tizuki has made himself right at home, starting a tribute thread to those who couldn't be bothered with the whole dying thing. We all took a moment as instructed before kean4311 decided to show us his manscaping. The entire town now rejoyces in the fact that penises have been mentioned.

Nyx was at it again within minutes asking dumb scouting questions involving pigs and arrows. Team meatlocker HQ wasn't sure but gave her polite smiles none-the-less. imirk needs to man up and post in all caps and abuse the spoiler tag in the world forums  

Geen was very confused by the burkas and saying crazy shit about ATM machines - mistaking the invading heroes for some pack of strange, weird sex cult. Might not have missed the mark so much there.... and on a final note - "Don't put items in the Bank it attracts zombies, leave them outside." - best advice so far.

Intermittent Advertisement Transmission!

Hey guys! Wanna go on an adventure?

Transportation Issues:

Since Mr Fasi failed to remove his mayor mobile - We have now claimed it as our own personal transportation through out the world beyond. Currently its parked quite a way from the nearest town but never fear - once tonight's party is over we'll get this baby running again so we can 'cruise' , 'do laps', pump our sound system, ya know? 'doof doof' - impress all the ladies