The Gallows Incident: Good News!

Some Swinging Hipster Meta Coverage 
"You'll come home from the holidays...in a body-bag. "

Straight from the world beyond! Fresh and shocking news reporting sightings of a huge probably-more-than-20 foot meta rising from the waves of Season 3!

Not to be confused with THIS family!! Censored for protection of innocents. 

Can't find that damned blueprint? Low on resources? Too freaked out to build the real deal? Don't fret! That's where the gallows comes into play! Go for the Meat Locker Alternative! Faster disposal, cheaper cost and recycled ropes! Go green!

Recently here at MLI we saw a rather daunting looking person in some executioner outfit donning some nooses in his casual manbag. He then proceeded to spew to our reporters of the Gallows Incidents that had been increasingly occurring in the world beyond. Reason? Oh... "meh-tas" just wanna have fun-un!

(Okay and justice, justice too.. )

If your jaw has not yet touched the ground we assure you that the death count of this meta's hands is a hefty 18 and counting! They unofficially go by the name of The Family. Yes, like a mummy, daddy, baby and heck chuck in the 2 year old labrador with 24/7 hyperactiveness. Except instead of fish rods and panty hose you'll find cupboards of stained nooses and a black book of prospective victims in their garage.

You know what to do when you see them in a town? Try to get in as fast as possible! You may be about to witness something magical! The meta has recently asked for some form of outfitting to be done by our fashion department and we have yet to work out something substantial and blood stained enough but we suggest they start wearing some swanky executioner outfits. These guys sure put Judge Judy to shame; their blows of retribution will hit harder than the town black-jack dealer who is slightly high off twinoids.

Good show chaps, you have sure set an example for years to come, may we recommend this snazzy phrase: for the greater good...

Warning: The Gallows will NOT earn you any sort of defence (this just in: unless you have a cemetery. Thumbs up dobergos and your super sekrit minion Anonymous!), only twice the satisfaction. But who builds the meatlocker for defence anyway? Phhffttt.

Enlarge for fun read

Lesson of the Day? [LOTD]
TMLI: being a good example since 19--
TGI: being an even better example since 19--

Note: Next time you witness a hanging you might wish to do your cheering/screaming to this groovin' beat inspired by the Gallows Incident.
100% credit and kudos to J-J-Joe Baldelliii (Alter ego, Felonious)

Feel free to post your [faked:optional] shocked reactions and admiration for the meta below:

Merit Badges Have Arrived

Sufferer: In recognition of your undying support of your favorite band... You have been awarded the "Nickelback Fan Club Badge"

Vanwolf: The "Just Call me Brett Favre Merit Badge". Who cares how many accounts you have closed forever?Never give up Vanwolf because you are a legend. We eagerly await your return from retirement.

ABH20: I cant say I remember hearing a single word out of you for the entire duration of the town but your last words are inspiring and true. The "I'm Surrounded by Idiots Merit Badge."

FASI: The "Billy Mays Merit Badge" Keep up the getting it done-ness and screw the rules you can use caps lock anytime you damn well please!

There may be more awards to come but these are some of the acknowledgments we thought were the most obvious and all we have done so far because we are in the midst of a tremendously competitive NES "Tiger Heli" tournament.